Needless to say, this has been a tough year. And the past five months, especially, have been the hardest I have EVER been through. Coming into the Christmas season I had the mindset that I just wanted to close my eyes and not open them until it was all over. Watching everyone get excited for the season...shopping, eating, and celebrating...I just couldn't get into it.
Having a broken heart and missing Jay so much, I would see everyone being happy and joyful; made me want to come unglued! And why is it that when you are suddenly single, it seems like everyone has someone? Walking through the mall would drive me crazy because all I could see were couples. It was then that I started really losing my focus for the reason why I celebrate Christmas in the first place. I made up my mind at that time to skip decorating altogether and not really celebrate anything and just try to get through to January.
Well, God had other plans for me...
In a staff meeting this month, my pastor gave a message that I will never forget. Pastor Paul spoke of what our attitude should be for what the Lord has done for us in Psalm 103:1-5. Here are the verses:
"Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle's!"
Well THAT'S a shot between the eyes! Or should I say to the heart? Thank YOU Lord!
After receiving the message from Pastor Paul, I felt a bit convicted regarding my attitude and knew that I needed to do something about it right away. The Lord impressed upon my heart that I need to put my Christmas tree up, and that I shouldn't decorate it as I would normally, but that I would print out a bunch of His promises and decorate the tree with them so that I can look at my tree and be reminded that He is with me...He encourages me...He heals me...He renews me...and above all else...He has saved me. THAT is the reason I am to celebrate this season.
So, yesterday I put my tree up. I attached all of the scriptures that I printed out...added a decorator plate with the one word that sums up what the Lord ultimately gives me...'HOPE'...and then I topped the tree with the star that Jay picked out last year for our last Christmas together. What a blessing to be given the insight that it would be our last...it was important that Jay pick out the topper so that I can be reminded of him for every Christmas to come. When I look at it - it reminds me that he is with our Savior, singing joyful praises to our Abba. Thank You Jesus for Your faithfulness!
Praise the Lord God Almighty for sending His Son to be born, to die, and to ascend to the right hand of the Father so that I will have eternal life. YOU are the reason I celebrate Christmas. May I never lose sight of that!
Merry Christmas, Everybody! May the Lord show Himself to each of you in a BIG way this season! My love to you all. God bless you.
2 comments:
((((Jamie)))) I love your tree; I think we all need to do a tree like this no matter what we are going through because this really honors Jesus; this gives God glory, this puts the focus on him and not on ourselves or our problems or our celebrations that sometimes crowd him out but all the glory goes to him
I'm so thankful you did this and I know it was hard to do but I know Jesus was right there with you as you were printing out the Scriptures and putting up the tree
funny, my journal entry tomorrow is going to be called "Against All Hope"; you have hope in Jesus, but you already know that!!
I wish you a Christ filled Christmas Jamie. I thank the Lord because I know he's been answering my prayers I've been praying for you in awesome ways
((((Jamie)))))
betty
You'll be in my special thoughts and I wish you a Blessed Christmas that brings peace to your heart dear.
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